let's get started but in different ways

i think i will continue to write here sometimes it's like my diary , but will try to don't talk about love after this post ... because i don't want to hurt anyone ,
everyone can fell in love sometime , yea it's right and it's easy for some people or hard for some others ...
everyone can swim through river stream but do everyone can swim opposite of that ? of not...
it's hard but do able , i think i need to do that , i won't beg for love anymore because i'm done ,it doesn't work like this...
now it's my turn to start , i'm just a bit changed , i'm not that kind of easy guys .
i won't say ah ok i loved you 1.5 years but i can forget you now because you want that ,
i never loved anything to leave it behind of me ,
but i won't talk anything about love here or in chats with you ... that light will left on in my heart i'll never turn it off ever ,

well where am i now ?
hmm now i'm at beginning again , even closer to where i started , heh
i will go military service i think , because i can't return to university anyway , even if they let me to back there . i won't do it ...

2 days ago i heard a song at the end of movie that says :

i don't care what you think
as long as it's about me
the best of us can find happiness
in misery


and i think i won't use any emoticons after now , i don't want anyone to know what i really feel
, (edited few hours later : no! lol i can't stop using them xD )
(love is mine , life is life , death is not for me )

so lets get started right now ...