hmm i tried to don't expect much from anyone , specially from you bestrider ,
i wanted to don't expect you to be like me , and be online because of me or come earlier on net ,
make something for me etc . .
but i see that i still some times expecting much from you , you were raiding in wow , and you said and you came online 15 min ago (2:45 AM) ,

but i think i have to understand that raiding is much fun than talking with me ofc ,
i should not expect you to do anything really ,
i would try to force something to my friends or families or other people ,
but i would never could force anything to ya , you know it :)

you see that i can't even tell these to your face , because i'm afraid that you stop talking with me ,
but i feel like this is wrong to tell my thoughts just here ... instead of talking face to face with you ,
this may cause problem laters ... (if there be later times anyway ) .


on these last years i learned alot of you , you made me to learn love(even though you don't know it yourself) / we had so much fun / we helped each other many times (your helps were more worth than my helps i think, i'm not talking about helping in wow) /
we suffered each other too , but it's the thing that everyone would have between them even as friends you would be mad some times upon each other and be the kindest person after a while again :)

right now you are in instance , i know that i was waiting whole day to talk with you (were almost going off because thought you won't show up like 2 days ago) , but atm i can't talk with ya because i don't want to interrupt ya , you'll go offline again in few min cause you got school tomorrow thought , and i'll be by myself again ...

well what ever , i have to learn to be alone , better to get used to it more than this , my greatest lone times are close ... and i can't help it unless learning to survive of anything which will happen to me or others in my life ,